Everybody in the family referred to my step-grandfather as “Papa.” He was one who made the most of the sunlight each day, working from sunrise to sunset. He mainly lived to work; farming and ranching were in his blood. Growing up as a kid, I used to help him plant and pick all kinds of fruits and vegetables in the fields. I fed the livestock at times (horses, cows, pigs, chickens, quails, and bird dogs).
Papa didn’t talk much, but he was practically pedagogical in his actions utilizing an economy of words, and if you watched him carefully, you would learn to appreciate his knowledge and skills and follow his lead on how to do things around the farm. He wore his gray Stetson hat everywhere. He shaped that hat in a way that revealed a softer side to him. I liked the dents and folds of Papa’s hat. If I wore a Stetson, I would want to indent and fold my hat the same way he did.
I can never recall a time Papa ever raised his voice at me, but he sure would get onto my cousins for failing to do something at various times. For some reason, I was spared his anger which dissipated quickly whenever I witnessed it. Apart from planting and harvesting, he showed me how to drive tractors, mend fences, go quail and dove hunting, butcher cows and hogs, and even how to get the sugar out of sugarcane! On rare occasions, he would philosophize on his worldview. He was a man of the earth and understood the challenges of farming and ranching. I lost count of the times Papa and I would survey the forty acres of the farmland and pastures in his WWII-era Willys Jeep.
I
loved the environment and soaked up everything about life on the farm that I
could. The good part was that I could walk away at the end of the day, unlike
my cousins. I loved swimming in the Imperial river and going to the beach and
playing baseball. I don’t remember my two cousins ever doing those things. Papa
was more of a father to me in some ways than my own biological father; I mean
no disrespect, but this was true. Strangely, my thoughts of Papa outweighed my
thoughts of my father throughout the years. I guess it was because he spent more
time with me, as busy as he was, to show me things.
My growing up under Dad’s rule was always do or else. Everything I did for Papa was motivated by a willingness to help or to help my cousins with their chores so we could play. It was a different routine than I was accustomed to at my home, but I wasn’t tethered to the harsh realities of farm and ranch life either. I never knew of my grandparents ever going on a vacation! Though I enjoyed being down on the farm, I knew I could never embrace that lifestyle, but I loved and embraced my grandparents.
My Dad is now 93 and going on 94 in December, God willing. While I was in the military, Papa slipped into eternity on 4.13.1973, roughly a month and a half shy of 68. I wasn’t saved at the time, and I knew nothing of the consequences of stepping out into a Christless eternity. Looking back as a believer during my times on the farm, I don’t recall Papa ever talking to me about God, alluding to God, or attending any church. He never told me that he loved me either; maybe he didn’t know how to in his macho world of farming and ranching. Telling someone that you love them and backing that up with action is more natural than refusing to say it and leaving the other person wondering through conflicting or ambiguous body language, yes?
When
I left for the military in December of 1970, I knew that my visits to the farm
would be few and far between. I was taking on a very hefty load in my new
venture in life! The last I remember seeing Papa alive was in 1972 while on
leave. Forty-nine years have passed since his death; it seems like it was but
yesterday, and I still miss him after all these years, lost or saved, loved me
or didn’t.
At times, I long to get back in that old Willys Jeep with Papa and watch his bird dogs go to work in a field of palmettos, pointing and waiting for the command to flush out the quarry, mostly quail. Then we would head back to the farmhouse and dress the birds for granny so she could fry them up for dinner. These were all earthy memories with no spiritual substance behind them. Oh, how much richer life would have been if we had allowed God to be in our lives and at the center of our lifestyle way back then!
Yahweh,
being omniscient, knows of my love and respect for Papa, but in all my years of
spiritual life, I never made a connection between my step-grandfather and
Yahweh as Papa. I supposed it was because Papa probably didn’t know the Lord? All I know is that I never thought of my grandfather when I referred
to Yahweh as Abba (Papa). You would think that rather odd given my feelings for
my grandfather, and you would be right!
One other thing, Jesus referred to a greater than Jonah or Solomon in this place. What these great men shared alike was a spiritual life in Yahweh. Now, whether Papa was saved or not, Yahweh was greater than anyone, saved or lost, for that matter! Granny was led to the Lord sometime after the death of Papa by my younger brother and his pastor. She died three months shy of 67 on 4.4.1978.
So, back to my prayers and praises to Yahweh last Wednesday morning, I was at a point in all of that when I declared to Yahweh, “You are my Abba, my Papa.” Then the silence “broke” when Yahweh spoke in a communicative manner that was inaudible but clearer in the mind than sound traveling through the ear gates and unmistakably clearer than a bell,
“A greater than Papa is here.”
I
was stunned! I saw the connection for the first time after all these years! In
my context, it was as if Yahweh intentionally brought up my step-grandfather
because he came to mind immediately when Yahweh spoke to me! These were the very
words He uttered to me that morning: no fillers, no add-ons, no interpretation
of what I thought He said to me, no angelic choir, and no shafts of light
beaming all around.
We know the context of a greater than … is here. Boy, how the Jews missed that in their unbelief in Jesus’ day! Their descendants still refuse to say His name! It would be unthinkable and unacceptable for any religious Jew to refer to Yahweh as Papa! But I know that Jesus is greater than Solomon and Jonah! So, why am I receiving this epiphany now that a greater than Papa is here?
My immediate gut reaction was breaking down in tears of joy. So, my spirit didn’t perceive that I was guilty of some sin and being called on it. But on a cautionary note, it is unwise for feelings to trump the truth of Scripture. Though my feelings were evoked, I cannot base a proper reaction to what was told me solely based on fluctuating feelings; I was moved to tears, but I also believed that I was called to turn in a different direction in my thinking. I took it that my grandfather belonged to the earth that was/is passing away;
I sensed that our relationship was changing by this divine communique that was respecting my connection with my earthly Papa. Nonetheless, the relationship between Yahweh and me was to be of something far greater than any relationship on earth, bar none. I love my wife and am willing to give my life for her, but a greater than my wife is here! I have always subscribed to Jesus first others second. Perhaps, we need to be reminded that “others” include us, too!
Yahweh
is my all in all over any earthly relationship! Some may even consider
Yahweh’s words to me as sort of a rebuke for not giving Him preeminence;
something we all encounter at one time or another; some will not. In either case, the words came across as drenched in love (agape).
Not only does Yahweh says that He loves us, but He also demonstrated it (cf. Rom 5:8; 1 Jn 4:10). And unlike mortal man, He will never leave us nor forsake us (Heb 13:5). He will spend time with us and show us things and love on us if we let Him! As Creator, who would have thought that He had time for all of that! These words by Yahweh were unexpected and overwhelming to me that morning!
Then,
I broke the silence with tears of joy over the idea that a greater than Papa is
here in my life forever. He wants to be my Papa in ways unimaginable to me, incomparable to any human relationship! Maybe the next question here is this; what word do you think Yahweh would use to fill in the blank for you, a greater than ___ is here? <><
