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Have you ever gone through a period of time in your life where you were plagued by fear and doubt? Your world had been turned upside down, and you didn’t know what was in store for you in the immediate future. You wanted to do the right thing as a believer in Jesus Christ so you mustered up the strength and put on a good front for yourself and others, but continued to struggle in the secret chambers of your heart where no one could peer into, even though you cleverly acted out the role of being a Christian to avoid being detected of any inner turmoil.
Whenever you were asked, “How are you doing?” You simply replied with the stock answer, “Fine.” But in reality you were not fine; your world had flipped upside down, and the blood was rushing to your head making you feel dizzy! You were afraid of what others might think if they discovered you were on the verge of falling apart. You wanted to be strong for others but you felt like your knees were going to buckle at any time. You wished you could just run away somewhere safe, anywhere where you were not known and start afresh. Your heart was so full of doubt, uncertainty, and questions that you were miserable.
I think some of the disciples, if not all, shared similar feelings when their world was rocked by the crucifixion of Jesus. They were fearful for their lives and went into hiding, doubtful of their future. Making sense of the insanity of the moment was too much to process. Everyone was experiencing a mixed bag of emotions, and a churning of the gut over the loss of Jesus. The haters of Christ were on a roll and picking up momentum; the future was dark and bleak.
During His post resurrection ministry, Jesus gave the disciples simple instructions to go to the mountain [an unknown location] in Galilee, and they followed His orders to the letter. When they saw Him they worshiped Him, but some doubted. This was not a doubt whether Jesus was alive or not because He had already physically appeared to His disciples. Some have explained this doubt as merely a problem with depth perception by referring to the clause following the word “doubt” – “And Jesus came and spoke to them” (Mt 28:18). In other words some didn’t recognize Jesus until He came near and spoke.
But does this visual problem adequately explain why all worshiped but some doubted while they worshiped? We are talking about men who had been with Jesus from the get go. We should not assume that because these eleven men had come to a saving faith in Jesus around a general time period that they were equal in spiritual maturity (cf. Jn 20:24-25). The truth of the matter is no believer has identical spiritual development with another, not even the eleven disciples.
As believers we share a common salvation, but after that, sanctification or growing spiritually varies like our fingerprints, common goal (Christ-likeness) different growth rate. We also share many of life’s experiences, like the eleven did on the mountain in Galilee, for example, but our spiritual insight and perception are different based on knowledge and application. We are as spiritual as we want to be, but no one runs head to head, toe to toe with another in spiritual maturity. Great wisdom realizes that "Though I have all knowledge, but have not love, I am nothing (1 Cor 13:2).
Make no mistake about God’s love in this matter. Jesus can love us no more or no less regardless of our spiritual maturity and zeal to be like Him. His love is infinite, eternal, and unchanging! Our desire to be like Him is directly proportional to our love for Him, but He loves us all the same regardless. Selah.
What this encounter with Jesus on a Galilean mountain reveals to us is that we can physically be exactly where Jesus wants us to be, but our hearts may be somewhere else spiritually – “some doubted.” In other words we can go through the motions with great dedication and effort, but be spiritually lacking or desensitized in some manner or degree. After all, some doubted as they “worshiped.”The Pharisees were guilty of honoring God with their lips, but their hearts were far from Him, and so can we if we are not guarding our hearts with all diligence, even though we know Him personally.
There is no way of telling what the reason was behind the doubt for some of the disciples, but whatever it was, the object of doubt was Jesus, and it prevented true worship of Him. How often have we went to church but failed to worship Him because our hearts were troubled and plagued by doubt? We cannot do both: worship Him and doubt who He is. Doubt is more than a mere case of mistaken identity; it goes deeper than that; it questions who He is and His ability. I am not talking about the principle of “when in doubt, don’t” (Rom 14:23), but when in doubt of Him, we won’t worship Him truly, and therefore, we will not serve Him truly. Worship is sensitive to the presence of God and recognizes that He alone is worthy of worship, but we got to see Jesus as God Almighty (Jn 1:1). And if He tells us to go here or there, He is with us in the travel, and there waiting on us at the appointed place (Heb 13:5).
We can only assume that once Jesus came near and spoke to His disciples all doubts dissipated (Mt 28:18). The power of His Word alone removed all doubt when “He spoke.” How do we know that? Ten of the eleven eventually died a martyr’s death, and John was exiled on the isle of Patmos. They all got their worship right, no doubts, and glorified God. There is no doubt about their commitment.
When we listen and heed the words of Jesus doubt flees and worship takes place, and we are ready to carry out His commands even unto death, if need be. When Jesus spoke the spiritual complexion changed for some. For others it only reinforced a proper response to Jesus. Only the Word can free us from our doubts, uncertainties, and questions of the future, setting us on a path of worship and obedience for His honor and glory. In that truth there can be no doubt.
“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me” (Jn 10:27). <><
